Poll: Have You Ever Had Postpartum Depression?

Comments

July 28, 2006 at 5:35 am

(1) Claire Coumbis says:

Funny thing…I’ve been very,very blue for 2 weeks now…leading to suicidal blue. Then I relaised that I have been in a complete state of confusion for at least a couple of months…I not considered that I may have depression…I’m a smart chick, lots to do…2 kids…today I put two and two together - When I finished breastfeeding my first child I fell pregnant with my second child within a month. I finished breastfeeding my second child a couple of months ago(she’s 15 months old), my first child is now 3.5 yrs old. I’m an accountant, so I added up all the facts … this is the first time in 3.5 years that my body has been running on ‘normal time’ hormones, not pregnancy hormones, and not breastfeeding hormones. I honestly thought that I was just going stir crazy after being home with the kids for so long… I thought that the moon was in the wrong sector, and working against me… now I realise that I may in fact have a problem… I am depressed. I cry every night now, and seem frozen in time during the day. I am normally a very organised person. I complete all of my chores (like Ground Hogs Day) every day.

I am going to the healthfood store tomorrow to try some serotonin, and some GLA…because I actually thought about killing myself tonight… and leaving my 2 beautiful little girls without a mother. Not a good place to be. I knew that I was in a dark place, but I thought that with time it would pass. It probably will pass naturally with time, but 2 months without enjoying my children is long enough! I’m smart, so I will not end up taking my own life, it is a very selfish action…but I am in a very dark place, and I would like some light. How is it that I have a gorgeous husband, and two angelic girls and I’m miserable? Is it the girlie hormones going wild after stopping breastfeeding? Or is it the depression that I have suffered from since my teenage years rearing it’s ugly head again…

Since I had my first girl I have slept very poorly… the girls have been really poor sleepers, and I have been very soft on them, hence my lack of sleep. I am wondering if the lack of sleep has affected my serotonin levels… but why have I only turned so dark since I stopped breastfeeding? (No it is not the guilt of giving it up - she had a long haul!!).

I don’t really need an answer to my problem, I just need a solution… and a quick one, just before I try to divorce my husband, and drive myself insane!!

October 1, 2006 at 10:30 pm

(2) Mary says:

The moment my little girl was born I began to feel like a fog had taken over.
I just thought it was physical exhaustion. Two days later I was crying for nothing. Everyone said it was normal and would disappear. No one wanted to see that something was not right. I knew it. I became very confused, forgetful and felt like an air head. I didn’t remember things and started every day unfocused. I am an accountant and I felt that everything was becoming out of control.Two weeks later I was afraid to touch the baby. I had visions of her falling out the window, falling out of my arms in the bath. My fears began to take over my life. I wanted someone to be with me all of the time. I didn’t know if the fears were real or not. I felt I could not seek help for fear that they would take my baby away. I was trapped and did not know which way to go. I didn’t think I could go on much longer. I decided to call the breastfeeding consultant at the hospital. Breastfeeding the baby was the only thing that I could manage to do with the baby.The consultant listened to my minor complaints, and then asked me whether I felt I was alright. I found the courage to tell her the truth. Although she erged me to call my doctor I could not to it. I wasn’t going to admit that this perfect child that I had been waiting for so long, wasn’t going to the most joyous time of my life. This could not be happening to me. And if so I should be able to control it. I felt helpless. The consultant called my doctor and two days later I was hospitalized. I was suffering from deep depression with pychois. With the help of the doctors and couselors I was able to return home within weeks. Still unable to function on my own, I was given different medications so effective some not. I was so determined to turn this thing around. I believed that I could fix it and get on with my life. It was not that easy.
I continued with therapy. Sometimes relying on the therapy to get me to the next day. There were days that I cryed all day, didn’t leave the house, answer the phone or could have a normanal conversation.My Mother had to move in with us to help.
Changes in medication helped. Slowly I began to have more good days than bad.
I was having trouble reading and recognizing numbers and letters. I could’t go back to work. Six months later I decided to beat this thing. I began teaching myself how to read again.
I had every book in the bookstore on depression. But there wasn’t any answers to tell me the way out.
You have to find yourself out. One step at a time. I found hope in reading others stories. I knew than that I wasn’t alone. This terrible thing that no would talk about had taken over my life. I don’t think anyone can really know was it is to loose part of your mind unless they experience it.
What was most helpfull was learning what the different medications were.
And finding another person who understands what you are going through.
And most of all understanding that this is not your fault, and you are going to get better. BE GOOD TO YOURSELF.
And when you finally get through more good days than bad you will know you are making progress. And you will be better than you were before this.
Believe me you will be better than ever.
You just have to have a good support team (mine was my doctor and therapst) and believe in yourself.
Good Luck - I have faith in surviving postpartum depression