Hate myself
- Compared to my siblings I was never a bright student.bright at nothing..i cant sing,dance,play music,nt good looking either.in short a waste.After school i cudn't clear the entrance and got admitted in a poor clg.i struggled to learn coz there were no good faculty.finally again i failed to clear exam for higher studies n dont even have a job.I feel like dying but dont have enough guts.i just wish somehow God will take care of me like he has always done.i m bored of staying alone in the room n seeing evryone leave for their jobs daily.all my family has been toppers,my cousins in school r toppers.only i m a waste.i hate myself.wish i get courage so that i can die.their is nothing left in life.
- —Guest Anu
so sad
- ive been reading comments and what people have said made me so sad i suffer from depression and want you to know you are not alone and there is help out there for you , dont give up ros
- —Guest ros
Why?
- I've always needed to know why things happen. It gives me great grades in school, and most people think I am brilliant. (ha ha definitely not.) The problem is that I don't know why life exists and I don't know why I should exist. I see no point to existence. It's so hard to go through every day that I really just want to give up. It would be so much easier. I used to be happy and cute and I had lots of friends, now I hate myself and I don't know if anyone cares about me. Really I'm pretty pointless so it would make sense that I have no friends, what value would I bring to their lives? none of course. I really don't know what people think and I wish I didn't care so much but I do. I just want to give up on so many things. Everything seems pointless and unnecessary. yeah I know I'm depressed but counseling is a waste of money because I don't want to grow up and get a job yaddy yaddy yadda. Seriously I'd rather just leave. now. good bye.
- —Guest good bye
What's the reason?
- I was diagnosed with clinical depression in October, it's march, where has my time gone, it's my sophomore year and I don't know what's going on. I get through eachday for my mom and grandpa. My dad favors my sister and couldn't care less about my problems. I've started cutting and it helps but I know it's not right. Did I do something to God for him to smite me this way, or does he even exist?
- —Guest Bri...
When does it end?
- I'm 32 years old, separated from my wife of 4 years, stuck in a dead-end high-stress job. I've suffered depression since I was 10. I've tried every medication under the sun and multiple counselors and nothing works. I am always lonely. I have very few friends, and the friends I do have I feel like I have to beg for attention. I feel like I put all the work in interpersonal relationships. I'll admit it - I'm desperate and starved for affection, and I feel ashamed and degraded. I try not to show it, because I know it scares people away. But if you're starved for food, you'll eat any offal you can get your hands on, and never mind dignity. Same thing if you're starved for human contact. You can't hide that kind of desperation. I cannot fathom living another 30 years like this. I am considering suicide. There is nothing in the world for me but loneliness and despair.
- —Guest AJW
suicide ease all pains?
- My roads ahead is lined with broken dreams.Im not alright and nobody seems to realise that fact,im just nobody.When the moment i got transfer to new school,i though i could change my past and become a new friendly person.My effords were no avail,despitte im good looking.But as soon people begin to realise my weakness and my poor academic result.All of them left me alone even in the class no one willing to talk to me or help me in homework.All of them despise me..Yeah they are those top student,i used to be like them but now im not top student anymore.It's complicated.Sometimes i just wish that the world is not so harsh and cruel,because it hurts me deeply.Does God really listen to my prayer? Im alone all the time.
- —Guest Kelvin.Chew
Lost
- I'm 22 years old, I finally got around to attending college again and following my dream career, but now more than ever I feel lost. I don't feel like anyone understands me or even bothers to, I find myself reaching out for a helping hand but everyone seems to be busy ALL THE TIME! Including family. The one person I came to actually love (my best friend, we never actually dated) left without warning or reason (and I know what your thinking maybe its something I did), I just told her how I felt about her and that's all it took. Ever since that happened everything just seemed to go wrong up to now.
- —Guest anonymous
no way out
- after reading all these posts i realize i'm not alone. i had a great social life, great friends, and still go to a top university. i recently got a d.u.i. and now my stupidity makes me feel so depressed i'm starting to loose everything. i can't focus on school and don't want to speak to anyone. i sleep longer hours and try everything to keep my mind off of what has happened to me. life as i once knew it is over.
- —Guest bad luck
Sad
- I am 10 years old. Life has been very hard for me. I am always crying. I take a pill everyday and see a therapist every monday. But I am still very sad. I hate my entire life and feel like nobody understands. Please help. I am considering suicide.
- —Guest Person
Sick & Tired of being Sick & Tired...
- I have "brain fog" everyday. Everyday I think "when am I going to get better? When am I going to be 'me' again?" Unfortunately, there are no answers to these questions. For my Mom's sake - that's the only reason I'm still trying to make it everyday. It is so hard to just do the things you need to do in order to survive. Going to work - OMG - I can barely get out of the bed!!! When I'm at work I spend all my time working pretending that everything is just fine. No one even knows. When I get home, I'm so drained from the "charade" I had to put on at work, that I don't have the energy or desire to work out, finish my schoolwork, or even take a shower! On top of everything else, my finances are so bad...it seems like God is punishing me for something or maybe this is Karma.
- —Guest woe is me
lonely
- i am 40 years,married at 18,became mother at 19.Difference between my husband and me is of more than ten years. My husband has no time for me,neither now or in the past.He does not like to go out ever for local shopping or not for any tour.My kids are grown up now.I spent my life looking after my kids. I tried to find happiness by playing with them,but now they have there own life.I feel lonely ,depressed all the time.I feel suffocated,want to cry all the time.I want to run away from my house,i feel unloved emotionaly and physically.I have started eating a lot.I hate myself,i feel fat and old. I plan to do lot of things but never execute it.I loathe my life. what should i do?I have no freind ,so i joined social networking sites.But i am unable to share my pain with anyone.I am very sad.
- —Guest alina
life is nt worth
- since my marriage,i feel depressed,very and very rare v had been in good terms.under one roof only we are like parallel lines.me have full in mind but depression make me stop,,,,what to write what not to,me forget in minutes,everything i feel is hotch potchdont want to getup again,jussssssssst want to finish all this play.please help me how to finish this worthless life.
- —Guest shashi
Scarlett
- i was depressed for about a year over a year ago now, i couldnt look in the mirror, was anorexic and self harmed. Most of the time i feel go but i cant stop thinking about that time in my life. i feel broken and i missed out on meeting boys, going out with my friends and growing into a more mature person. i still suffer for very low self esteem and have no idea how to cope with stressful situations sometimes getting panic attacks other times going back to self harm. All i want to do is get over it but I cant help feeling like somethings missing and i dont know how to normal. but on the plus side as weird as it sometimes feels attempting to get back to living my life Im trying and thats something.
- —Guest thought it was gone
Curious, Curious
- I've been happy most of my life, and yet lately some new emotions have envaded my happy feelings. I hope I'm not depressed, I don't have the right to be. Sleep had always been welcome, but I had preferred my time staying awake chatting or reading the latest issue of Harry Potter. Nowadays I feel myself longing to be asleep more often, taking naps and sleeping-in on weekends. I find myself thinking how wonderful it would be if I didn't have to wake up. If I could stay dreaming forever. I would immediately scold myself and turn back to my high school work. However, lately that same work became unappealing and success a bore. I lost my motivation to be the best I could be and spent my days watching life through a window in my room, wondering if anything could shake me from the slump I have fallen into. As time passed the feelings did not vanish and I was left with the question of what is wrong with me? I'm curious if this is depression and am rather hoping it is not...
- —Guest So many questions
not sure
- before i fall asleep at around 2am i wished to myself that i would not be able to wake up. i feel lost and confused. i have no one to go to that would make me understand. not doing well in school, no job, no social life. everytime i get the courage to try i stil fail but even the satisfaction of trying does not help me. friends do not really understand and are not willing to help. just want to take sleeping pills or even those happy pills just so that i can feel something. not really into self mutilation, already disfigured. understand there are other with problems but that does not change the fact taht i have some too. and i do not even know why i feel depressed at times. apart of me wants to hurt everyone while another part feels sympathy. conflicting views. another part do not know what to do. life does not seems to be getting any better so why live. try to play off myself so that people do not think i am depressed because no one liks being around downers. but then i feel fake. | :
- —Guest sohm wan
