It took me a long time to know that I was depressed. Looking back, I now realize that I had my first bout of depression when I was about 7 years old. I can remember waking up day after day, hoping that today would finally be a "good day." I was quiet and withdrawn at school, didn't sleep well, and felt sad. It was several years later, however, when I took a college psychology class that I realized that what I had been feeling all those years wasn't the result of personal weakness. It was a real illness and could be treated. That realization changed my life.
How did you know that you were depressed?Share Your Experiences
Being young and depressed.
- I remember being diagnosed with depression at the age of twelve.. I, used to put scarfs around my neck and 'try' to commit suicide, but of course, I never hurt myself, and never actually done it. I have a long story, full of a military dad, a divorce, moving in, new relationships, fighting, and, bullying. Luckily for me, my name suited me.. Faith. I hoped for a better future, I was tired of constantly thinking of dying, of crying myself to sleep, to no one listening, or understanding! I, was sick and done. I did play soccer, and I did hope, to play for Womans professional soccer, Hope Solo was, and still is my role model, and I remember going to practice, and seeing everyone do better then me, and I felt ashamed, and crushed. I was heartbroken. On top of that, I was dealing with more problems at school. School was the roughest time.. and I hated it. I was failing really. Because I had so much on my plate. BUT. Since I'm running out of characters, know this. It will get better.
- —Guest Faith
No Way Out
- Hey there. Just came out of my own tricks of happiness. I have had friends they look up to me growing up I was there support, happy, no one was there for me. No body is there for me unless I have money, or for pity, because I have a big facial flaw, since birth. Operations would have been done, scar to be removed, but I hit this depression, to even care, my best friend died, even then I felt numb, like I had no more feelings. When I was little, I thought these kids were playing hide and seek, but was locked in a closet with some boy who started taking off my clothes, then the door opens and even my crush sees, everyone saw, and I'm just a little kid and from then on (elementy school) I was insecure with myself, I slouch, I forgot how to interact with others, always self conscious even around girls because girls even assaulted me sexually, in little ages, and it led me to tempt a lil bit till I realize how wrong it is, I'm easily naive, even cute guys take it for desperate, never comfy
- —Guest Invisible Awesome
i dont know what this feeling is called?
- Okay i think it started like 4 or 5 years ago when my dad started to make soccer teams for us the girls and my cousins could join in..everything was going well till this one day i really dont know the reason some of my cousins got out our soccer.team and maked a new one i felt sad and dissapointed after like a week later we found out that we had to play against each other....and thats where it all started , i guess we took the game to serious that we started pushing, and kicking..i think we wanted to show whos the best? Sometimes i ask my self how can a.stupid soccer game breaked our family apart
- —Guest guest anonymous
- I don't wat it is its been third time i loved someone really hard and she again ditched me....am alone no one cares abt me..am living in a middle class family and my parents are really loving and caring....and we are 3 brother and sister....am the one one who is 22 and still get my food on my desk...but i don't eat that my mom shouts and then i eat but not well...my father's nature from my childhood is really strict...i always fear of asking anything from my father now its like i cannot share my feeling at all with my parents as there is a huge gap from my childhood till date... every-night i try to sleep hardly sleep for 1 or 2 hrs..always think of the girl i loved the most...cry all nights same happening from years....am totaly frustated from my life...think of ending this life bt evrytimes something is there which stops me but aftr 2-3 days things are again same...am totaly fed up just want to end this life.....:(
- —Guest Din
I'm so lost
- I don't eat much or sleep much and cry a lot, I don't do what I once loved, I feel alone here with no friends anymore and think death will be better, I'm scared one day I just won't be able to cope any more. I'm suicidal and cutting or burning makes the sadness of pain leave but for a minute. Seen doctors and shrinks. Been on meds but nothing helps, just a lost soul now. I'm quiet and shy now. I just wish I knew why its just me feeling this way.
- —Guest Michelle June Bauer
dont knw whats wrong with me.
- I used to be a happy person, outgoing who loved to socialise. but now im always sad and angry. 90% in day im sad, en i dnt enjoy people company anymore i want own all the time. i cant sleep at night, what worries me is that i have two beautifull kids but sometimes i cant stand them also. please help. i feel worhless and i feel like nobody cares. i feel like crying all the time.
- I'm not sure if I have depression, but I might do. I cry over nothing, especially at night and when I come home from school. I get angry or upset with people for no good reason. Everyone treats me like I don't exist and I never fit in. I am thinking about starting to cut myself too. My head is seriously messed up one way or another, I sit in my room doing nothing for hours on end because I feel like I'm not worthy of doing anything fun... My three 'best friends' could be the cause of all this because they treat me like trash and go off without me but I'm sure it's something more serious. I am going on a trip with the school soon, it is a 2-night stay at an adventure centre. I don't feel like going AT ALL!!! Can someone enlighten me?
- —Guest Just Me
Nightmare as a Life
- I am 13. Depression struck me around a year ago. I just took some online tests that said I am highly depressed. I get made fun for my wieght from my whole family for half the time no reason. My parents have been abusing me and my siblings since childhood, they see it as punishment. Since I was in grade 2 they started hitting and making fun of me more than my siblings combined because that is when I started gaining weight. I hought I was just sad because of that, but it is more than that. I see everything as my fault, imagine how good the world would be if I wasn't in it. I cut myself mostly on my legs but not as a suicide attempt but just to inflict pain. Until now I have cut myself 17 times and attempted suicide 3 times.Since I am only 13 I cant go to a doctor about this. I put on this act to my friends that my life is happy and make up excuses about my scars. I have rapidly gained weight, have trouble sleeping and cry myself to sleep if I do sleep. I am eppressed and need help.
- —Guest trying to hold on
tried of this life
- my mother was depressed everyday, if it wasnt for my g-ma dont know what i would do. she died, my father left when i was 6, i was told he beat here and we had to hide from him sometimes i dont remember any of this, my brother was 12 s he told me. we are 1 messed up family, at 20 i married and was abused mentaly, physical, sexual by him. was scared to leave but finally found a way. the next husband hit me a couple times, and the 3rd once, they were all over powering i found out. now iam alone and cant even see ever getting married again, i have trouble trusting anyone. dont depend on no one but myself, every one is dead now except my brother and he has bad ptsd from being molseted when he was 12,sister is just got to have her way, dont speak to either by my dr. orders. my big problem is im retired now and have very few friends but if they dont come by or call i get sad even say iam worth not having as a friend. i have been told by my dr i hve ptsd, bi polor, anxety, depression. what now
- —Guest deane
Please end the pain
- I am 9 I'm convinced I'm depressed even thoug I haven't been diagnosed I know my mother and father and siblings hate me my siblings always steal my stuff my father yells at us and hits my sisters I can tell my parents wish we were never born I consider sucked a lot but I can't bring myself 2 do it only have 1 true friend one of my ex friends punched me in the face at my birthday party my teachers never like me I'm a disappointment 2 the human race I wish god would just end the pain and kill me come it would be a lot better of I was never Ron if I died please god end the pain.
- —Guest Anonymous
I don't know what's wrong.
- I don't know if I'm depressed..I don't know what depression is, really. I know that I'm sad. I know that I don't really like how I'm feeling. And I don't really see a point in living, because we all die one day. I can see me having a future, an average one, but I don't want to live in it. I don't want to be there. The guy I like likes someone else, but we joke around and call each other boyfriend and girlfriend. I see them kiss once, and since then my appetite has changed. I haven't been eating regularly. I just want to be skinnier, even though I'm already skinny. I don't think I'll ever be pleased with myself, or this life. I can see that so many other people are upset, and there is nothing I can do about it. I can see the pain in their eyes, even when they say nothing. I just want it all to end. I don't even know why I'm sad, or "Depressed"..
- —Guest Llamadelrey
I don't know what to do with my life
- Hello I'm currently 11years old and I'm not sure but I think I'm depressed I've looked up child depression and it says if I have five of the symptoms I could have depression, well I had all of the symptoms. Oh My right now I already feel like I wanna cry but I won't I'll just keep talking and I'll be fine well I need someone to vent to but I tried to tell my sister but she won't take me sereousely and does not believe me I need someone to talk to but I'm to emberassed about it and don't want to tell my parents I just don't know what purpose I have in life. Sometimes when I do something stupid in front of someone and one of my parents subtly points it out I go strait to the bathroom and lock myself in there and get a poity thing and write the word stupid or some other name on my arm and then I just hide it and when the scraches fade I just do it again the next time I feel so guilty about doing it after but i still do I think I hide it well by acting happy. Anyway that's not all but bye:
- —Guest Ima girl
- hoping not to wake up each day,have prayed for years not to wake up each day gets wrost though/felt like this sense I was 6-7-8yrs old
- I am 12 yrs old my parents got divorced when i was 7 and my dad is unemployed. My mom works 4 jobs ande is really stressed. My sister makes things worse. I feel like its all my fault, i am always negative, and i have trouble sleeping is there something i can do to be happy again?
- —Guest guest 2
- I'm almost 18 years old now and over the past couple of years I've detached myself from my social circle of friends. I quit college thanks to losing interest in my study. I have good luck with women but feel like it's never enough. Love isn't enough, I wish I knew what was. I was raised pretty much on my own, just me and ny mum. I have 2 brothers and sisters but I only speak to one sister. The rest then are my dads kids, they only found out I existed last year. Their ages span from 15 - 24. I don't wish my past was any different, I just wish I had something to jump out of bed for in the morning. I just sit around now and do nothing. Even those who are still in contact with me, they don't even trust me or see me as a friend. I don't know what I want in life, but friends would be a nice start.
- —Guest Zent